Just when I thought everything was at its best, and everything was okay, this comes up.
Honestly, I feel totally blanked out right now. I don’t know what to think, I don’t know what to feel, I don’t even know what I’m supposed to write. Maybe I’ll just go the part where tears would come running in my face every time I think of it.
I love my grandma. She’s just the greatest. I mean, I totally respect her and love her and disobeying her doesn’t even cross my mind. Maybe because all she ever showed to me was pure love from the start. She’s the reason why I’m even into dancing now, because she’s the one encouraging us to take dance workshops when we were still in grade school. She even gives me extra allowance now when I’m kinda out of cash. And she even remind me to put a smile in my face always and take away that frown that I have every time I’m at home.
But what totally moved me was when she heard about this…thing. She just found out recently that my aunt had plans of making me stop going to school (and I’m an incoming 4th year college student btw, which is the crucial part of college). They had the talk while they were having lunch, and just as my grandma heard about it, she just shouted like “What?! He’s gonna stop schooling?” and walked away from the dining table. Just thinking about it just makes me teary eyed, since she just had a mild stroke and it kinda hurts me looking how she has difficulty walking, plus she’s depressed, thinking about me.
I knew about what happened with my grandma’s walkout scene over lunch when we had this long talk with my aunt and mom. And seriously, I hate long, irritating, pressuring talks that puts the spotlight on me. IHATEITIHATEITIHATEIT! GAHH! I even promised myself, if they’ll take that plan seriously and make me stop school, I’m gonna kill myself. Literally. No joke.
I’ll still figure things out between me, my grandpa, my aunt, my mom..and myself =.= But I’m confident in standing up for myself because I know, my grandma’s always got my back.
I’ll prolly forget about what I wrote here tomorrow. So good luck to me and to whatever will happen. >__<